1. You Apologise Without Knowing What You Did Wrong

I used to say “sorry” for everything — taking too long to reply to a text, bumping into someone in a doorway, asking for help.

It wasn’t because I’d done something wrong… it was because I’d been trained to believe I was wrong.

What to do instead:

Pause before you say “sorry” and ask yourself — am I apologising for being me, or for something I truly need to make right?

2. You Second-Guess Even The Small Stuff

From what to wear, to what to eat, to which route to take home — it’s like every choice needs a mental “approval” before you make it. That’s not overthinking. That’s conditioning.

What to do instead:

Pick one thing each day and choose it without hesitation. The more you practice, the more your nervous system will learn you can trust your own decisions.

3. You Rehearse Conversations In Your Head

I’d run through entire scripts before seeing certain people — predicting what they might say, how I’d respond, how I’d avoid “setting them off.” It’s exhausting.

What to do instead:

Give yourself permission to be unpolished. You don’t need to predict the future — you need to show up as the real you, even if your voice shakes.

4. You Feel ‘Wrong’ Without Knowing Why

This one is the most insidious. It’s that subtle, nagging feeling that you’re not enough, that you’ve messed something up — even when you can’t name what it is. That feeling? It’s not the truth. It’s a leftover survival mechanism from when you had to read the air to stay safe.

What to do instead:

When that feeling comes up, literally say out loud: This is not my voice. This is the past talking. Then, follow it with a grounding truth — “Right now, I’m safe. I’m allowed to exist as I am.”

Here’s What I Want You To Know

That voice doesn’t have to run your life forever. You can rebuild your trust in yourself — not overnight, but piece by piece, choice by choice, boundary by boundary.

If you’re ready to quiet his voice and turn up your own, The Liberated Woman is where we do it together.